13 | "The Assignment is Different" | Aligning Life with God’s Calling

In this episode, Shelley Meche'tte shares her powerful story of surviving three strokes in a single day and the transformational journey that followed. She opens up about the moments leading up to the strokes, her experience in the ER, and how recovery reshaped her perspective, her healing, and her sense of purpose. Shelley reflects on the emotional impact on her family, the importance of honest conversations about faith, fear, and recovery, and how stepping into alignment shifted her entire career. This episode dives into resilience, purpose, and what it means to embrace a new God‑given assignment in life. 

Connect with Shelley:

Journey w/God, 5 Days to Realignment, Reflection and Renewal

God Said NO! A Stroke Survivor's Story of Resilience, Recovery & Renewal (waitlist)

Instagram: Shelley Meche'tte

Website: Shelley Meche'tte

Connect with this show on Instagram @wherewerisepod

Transcript

Khalila McCoy 0:02

Hi, I'm Khalila McCoy, and this is the podcast that always gives you something to reflect on. This is where we rise. Hi everyone, it's so great to be here with you this week. So I have to tell you something. Someone recently pointed out that in every episode, I say how excited I am that you're here and how excited I am to talk to the guests. Well, guess what? It's true. As I shared back in episode zero, listening louder, I love talking to people and learning from them. Talking with each guest has brought me so much joy. So I am excited all the time, and I hope you are excited too. I hope you're laughing, sometimes crying, learning, and growing as much as I am. Today's episode is the assignment is different. This is something our guest, Shelly Mache, says when she talks about her shift in her career. Shelly is a woman of faith, filled with God's love, living her purpose, and the survivor of not one, not two, but three strokes. Now she uses her story to inspire other women to walk in their purpose. That is a different assignment. We all know that on the journey of life, every path isn't smooth, but sometimes it's the struggle that leads us to our strongest, most aligned selves. So let's jump into this conversation. I know Shelley's fun and infectious energy will keep you hooked. Hi, Miss Shelley. How are you today? I am doing well. Thank you so much for having me. Now, we got a chance to talk on the phone already a little bit about your story, about what you're gonna share today. And you didn't give me all the details, but I am very excited to hear more. I know that you have a great story to share, great faith to share in your episode. I feel it's gonna be a great blessing to everybody listening. So I'm just gonna have you jump in and get started and just tell us who you are and what you're hoping to share with us today and what we what we're gonna be able to take away from your life story.

Shelley Meche'tte 2:23

Absolutely. I am Shelly Mache, and I actually uh, well, I say that I used to be a coach, but that's not true. I still am a coach, empowerment speaker, um, and best-selling author. But after my experience, God has just kind of rerouted me a little bit. I used to work with moms who were mompreneurs, so helpingpreneurs balance motherhood and um and business. And so if if any woman is a mom and you're trying to do a business, you know it's a lot to juggle. And so that's what I was doing. But as someone who survived three strokes in one day about seven months ago, oh wow, God kind of, yes, God kind of rerouted me just a little bit. I still speak, I still coach, but now he has opened up the door for me to not work with my entrepreneurs, but to work with faith-driven women entrepreneurs so that we'll put down the grind and pick up grace and so that God can show us how to grow our businesses and how to align our life with who he has called us to be, so that we're not always frustrated, burned out, angry, bitter, you know, um, irritable. Uh, and so that came about, like I said, after that experience, after me walking into an ER one day, literally because I had head pains, not knowing that just a few hours later, I would literally be clinging on to life in an ER bed.

Khalila McCoy 3:47

Wow. Yeah. When again, I said we talked ahead of time, but I did not realize that the three strokes happened in the same day. I thought it was over time. Okay, so walk us through that day. You had just regular head pains. What did it feel like that made you go to the ER?

Shelley Meche'tte 4:06

Well, the thing is I didn't really run to go to ER because I've had migraine since I was a teen. So it's not like I was so like, oh my goodness, I have a pain in my head. I was already on medication. But the thing is, I hadn't been taking the medication as much, which was great. So that meant I wasn't having um headaches. Frequent, yeah. And so I wasn't taking it. But what I found is that over the course of uh a few weeks, I don't know, it could have been even more than a few weeks. Maybe it had been, you know, a good month or so. I'm not a hundred percent sure anymore. But over that time, I noticed that I was taking them a bit more. Okay. And so I was having more frequent headaches. Not that the headaches themselves had changed, but they were more frequent. So it was already on my radar to be like, you know what? I'm gonna have a neurology appointment because they're just more frequent. And then I began noticing that, wow, you know, my my eyes kind of hurt when I have these um these headaches now. So when I would look up, my eyes would hurt. They were very, very sensitive. Um, but again, the reason why it didn't jump out at me is because I have been told before that migraines change. Okay. And I have been having some some ear problems, and my neurologist has said, you know, migraines do change. It could show up in different ways. This could happen, that could happen. So once again, I I'm just not cluing into that. I just thought maybe it's part of it. So when I was gonna go to uh to the doctor, it wasn't because I was so concerned. It was maybe things are changing. Maybe I need to change my medication for whatever reason that that is. But two weeks prior to that, I was with my family for an event. And as I was sitting there, a sharp, sharp pain hit me so bad that I grabbed my head. Wow. And my mom, you know, she's like, oh my gosh, you know, are you okay? And my daughter's like, you know, are you all right? And I felt a little, a little woozy. Mm-hmm. Um, got up to get some water, and I'm just like, wow, this is really, really painful. I am definitely gonna have to make sure that I I get this appointment because this really, really hurts. Fast forward two weeks before I, before I even made it to the doctor, mind you, I hadn't even made the appointment yet. I'm like, oh yeah, let me make the appointment. Let me make the appointment. Blah, blah, blah. Right? Let me make the appointment. The night before, as I'm sitting talking to one of my daughters, uh, I have a sharp pain again. And it was so sharp, I I yelled out, oh, you know, and I grabbed my head. And my daughter's like, oh my gosh, you know, what is going on? Before I could even answer her, another one hit me and it kind of like tossed me back into the bed. That's how how much it hurt. At the time, which I did not didn't correlate it because of the banter that me and my kids have, my daughter, you know, was playing with my lip, and she's like, Why are you talking funny? And I just like brushed her hand off. I'm like, girl, move. Ain't nobody talking funny. I didn't feel like I was talking funny. But now, looking back on it, that was a bit clue. My lip was drooping. Did not know that. Okay. And in the middle, in the middle of the night, I had the third and five. I had already said, I'm going in the morning. But before the morning could even come, another pain jolted me out of my sleep. So I'm like, yeah, if I wasn't gonna go, which I already was, but I'm like, if I wasn't gonna go. The sun couldn't even come up good, girl. I was up. I'm like, I am out of here.

Khalila McCoy 7:49

Yeah.

Shelley Meche'tte 7:50

Still with the same thing in mind that, you know, if I if there is something wrong, praise God, I'm here, I'll catch it. You know, not a problem. It's probably just the change. Get there. I'm in ER in the waiting room, child. I'm watching TikToks, I'm laughing, I'm eating snacks. And um, after about two hours of me just chilling, I go into the back with the ER doctor. We're going through some uh some tests, and right in the middle of us going through the test is when the first stroke happens. Oh, wow.

Khalila McCoy 8:25

Yes. I mean, that's a blessing that you're right there in front of the doctor.

Shelley Meche'tte 8:29

Right in front of the doctor. So you cannot tell me that that was not orchestrated. I had spent that entire time in the waiting room, no pain, no issues, nothing. And then as soon as I got to the back, once we began the test, that's when the first stroke happened. Right.

Khalila McCoy 8:49

Well what is that like? Do you do you know what's happening to your body? Do you feel anything? Like what what happens when you have a stroke?

Shelley Meche'tte 8:56

Yeah, you know, I can only speak for for myself, is that at that particular time I was in the midst of trying to repeat something that she said. She had asked me to spell the word world. And I kept trying to figure out kind of like what what do you mean? You know, like what are what are you saying? And it's like I understood, but I didn't understand. It's it's, you know, so I I hear what you're saying, but for whatever reason I couldn't process what you were saying, if that makes sense. So I I hear and I understand what you're asking me to do, but it's just that for whatever reason, I cannot process what you're asking me to do. So it's like I hear you, and she kept saying it again, and I kept going, what like what do you mean? Like, huh? You're saying spell something, but I'm constantly going, like, huh? You know. Um what? At that point, I saw the word world in my head, and it began to disappear, starting from the D all the way to the W. And it just disappeared right in front of me. Um, and at that point, when I was trying to spell, I just went back. I fell back into the bed into a stroke. So I was very cognitive of every single thing that was going on, all of the movement that was happening, them, you know, snapping their fingers in my face, the conversation. I was very well aware of it. And then, you know, I don't even know how many minutes afterwards it was just like, okay, you know, I'm back. I just came back. At that point, they didn't know if it was a stroke, if it was a seizure, you know, they were checking blood sugar and things of that nature. I called my husband, I called my mom, you know, for for them to come. And um, and actually, I really had told my mom and my daughter, I'm like, it's fine, you know, they're gonna run some tests, they're not sure what what happened, blah, blah, blah. In the midst of the conversation with my mother, I went into a second stroke.

Khalila McCoy 11:02

Oh my god.

Shelley Meche'tte 11:03

While she was on the phone with me. Okay. Yes. And it's that one that ended up taking my speech. So by so I was on the phone talking to my mom, but by the time my mom made it there, my speech had been impaired. Wow. Yes. Yes. And while my family was there in the room with me, my children had gone back into the waiting room. And so while my mom and my husband were in there, we were talking and, you know, as much as I could, because at that time, like I said, my speech had been impaired. I had done some other tests and things like that. And in the midst of it, I went into another another stroke. And that's the one that almost killed me.

Khalila McCoy 11:47

Wow. So what happened for the third one?

Shelley Meche'tte 11:50

Is it the third body kind of literally in my third stroke? I literally began to feel the life leave my body. So I literally, and the the best that I can describe it is if you have a sponge and you're slowly squeezing it from the top to the bottom. So that that was the life. The life was literally just kind of draining out of my body. And I felt it start at my neck and I felt it move down. And I knew consciously, because it didn't start in my, you know, in my head, it didn't start at the top. It literally started in my neck. And so I understood that by the time this reached my feet, that I would be gone. So I was very, yes, I was very aware of the fact that that I was passing. I was very aware of the fact that this was the end. In the midst of that, you know, I looked up at my husband to let him know that I loved him. And um I looked to my mom to let her know that I that I loved her. You know, um, my kids weren't there, so my husband, he he ran out of the room to grab my kids so that they could come in and say goodbye. Oh my god.

Khalila McCoy 13:06

And um Was this like slow? Like how like how would you say the time frame was for this?

Shelley Meche'tte 13:12

It kind it felt it felt like, you know, um, it didn't feel slow, but it didn't feel fast. It was it's it was just like a, you know, just uh kind of like an energy draining. Yeah, just like a like a physical drain to the point of where at one point I began to say to my mother and my husband, I can't breathe. You know, I I can't breathe. And my mom began looking around and she's like, you know, nothing is going off, your vitals look well, but I knew that I was no longer breathing for myself. A breath began to come from above and began blowing inside of my body. And so I knew, though, that I was no longer breathing on my own and that that was the spirit of the Lord just calming me because I I jumped in panic because I couldn't breathe. And as soon as I got ready to really freak out, this breath just began to just slowly blow within my body. And I I laid back down and my mom kept looking around, going, like, you know, I don't see anything wrong with the vitals. So I always tell people, I don't know what that was gonna look like on their end, if it would have looked like a cardiac arrest or something like that. But I knew that at that point, oh, I'm not even breathing on my own anymore. This is this is really just God's hand calming me so that I don't end up being all sporadic as this is going through. My mom, she gave this scream after I told her that um that I loved her. She she just belted out this this scream that I've never heard before. And you know, and I and I prayed to never ever hear again. And she just screamed, no, and she said, No, God, not my daughter. And everything was just happening, and all of a sudden, the the the pressure that was happening in my body got to the bottom of my stomach and stopped. It just stopped. And I began to chuckle. And as I yes, I began to chuckle. And I know my family was like, you know, because the atmosphere just changed, you know, there's an atmosphere of emotional chaos at one moment, and now all of a sudden I'm chuckling. I know, and I didn't even see my family, but I know they was looking like, so is this what happens in the end? People just kind of go. They just kind of like, you think this is funny? We are not thinking this is funny. Do they just out like like what happens here? But when I chuckled, I said, I whispered, I said, God said no. God said no. And as soon as I said that, the life, I don't know how quick it was, but it began to come back into my body. And I know for a fact that I was on my way out of here because both my mother and my husband touched me and said my body was completely ice cold. Oh my goodness. Ice cold. My mother said it felt like I had been in the Mowork. Because that, and and I so I know that what I felt is what I felt, which was a life literally trained itself from my body. But once it got to the bottom of my stomach, it stopped. And God reversed life at that moment.

Khalila McCoy 16:49

Did you feel it start to fill back up?

Shelley Meche'tte 16:51

Like was it an instant? No, I do not have that recollection. I don't have that recollection of literally feeling it. You know, um, my whole thing, there was so much that was kind of happening at the time because my family is like, you know, what's going on? You know, what's happening? Are you oh are you okay? I would really have to ask my family, like, how soon was it that I I set up or, you know, what happened? What I my next memory is of me being in the room. And that's after my husband had jogged that memory for me. Because at first that was gone too. And he reminded me, oh, remember, you know, you they asked you if you could walk into the room into this, and I was like, oh, yeah, yeah, I do remember that. So I only have that memory because he jogged it for me. But other than that, my next, my next full memory is really being in the in the hospital room and trying to figure out. My husband was holding a piece of bread and me trying to figure out what's the name of that? What what is what is that called? Yeah. You go, yeah. That's my next full memory, trying to figure out what Chili's toast was called. I'm like, we got a name, y'all. It got a name. They were eating. I wasn't. I was just looking. I'm like, man, because you know, nobody fed me at that point. They like, you just worry about breathing. Yes. But a nurse came in the next day, which again, I don't remember this nurse, but a nurse came in the next day and she said, Oh my gosh, you're here. And and she came over and she hugged me. She's like, You're here. And I said, Well, we know you wasn't expecting to see me, right? We know what you was against, right? But she was so shocked to see me. She's like, Oh.

Khalila McCoy 18:54

Now, when you were going through that, like, you know, like the life draining, did your family call in the doctors and stuff? Like, what were their reactions to what you experienced?

Shelley Meche'tte 19:02

My my mother, uh, I do recall uh at some point that a nurse was in there and my mother kept saying, because my mom, my mom was, was slapping me, trying to get me to come back. And at one point I was like, listen. Okay. Yeah, I remember the nurse saying, ma'am, you have got to stop hitting her. I'm like, can you please let her know? You know. And because I because I was kind of, I was still out of it, I was thinking these things. I just couldn't say them. But when the nurse was like, you have got to stop hitting her, I was like, Can you please, can't can you let her know? Can you let her know this is not helping? And I remember my mom going, okay, then do something. You know, do do something, help her. And so um, yeah, that's the only thing that I that I remember of that, that little piece of her saying to to the nurse, you know, do something for her, you know. She's she's not here. So yeah.

Khalila McCoy 20:03

Mm-hmm. What was the recovery like? So you talked about like being back in the room looking at the bread and things like that. How long were you in the hospital after that?

Shelley Meche'tte 20:12

You know, I was released from the hospital a couple of days later, but here's the kicker. I was released from the hospital with no medication. Um nothing. Yeah. The doctor who was on uh who was on call that day, you know, he kind of kind of and I don't want to I hate using the word like he brushed things off, but looking at me after the situation, he just kind of felt like, okay, we've looked at you, we've run scans, we did this, they they uh they monitored my head for 24 hours to make sure that there was no damage. I had no no damaged tissues, no blocked, nothing, absolutely nothing. They uh from the time that I prepared to leave, they already told me that in my files it would only say stroke-like symptoms because medically they could not say that because nothing had been damaged. Absolutely nothing. Okay. Everything, you know, um, my body was my left side was weak from it going numb. So I went numb over 75% of my body, but yeah, I was still able, I was weak, but I was able to walk. I still had to to build that up, you know, to this day. I still have tingles or burning or this. So those those things do happen. But when I left, I left with no medication and no real 100% plan. So two days later, I was rushed back to the hospital again. Uh-oh. And then for the exact same thing. And what was happening is my my blood pressure was going out of whack. But no one to this day, I'm I'm still going to the doctor, figuring out different things. You know, is this the cause of the pressure? Is that the cause of the pressure? So I'm still seeing doctors, seeing kidney specialists, seeing, you know, liver. Special things like that to see if there's any connection to it. But when I left at that time, I wasn't given anything. So without medication, I was still skyrocketing all over the place, you know, with my pressure. So two days later, I was back in the hospital with a pressure that was 190 over 100.

Khalila McCoy 22:18

Oh, girl.

Shelley Meche'tte 22:20

You know this. Right? And then from there, um, I ended up being back in the hospital um again. And then I I developed severe anxiety. And then I was back in the hospital. So I was back and forth in the hospital probably for a good maybe a month and some back and forth. And the the nighttime would trigger me. And so as soon as the sun went down, I would begin to hyperventilate. I would begin to sweat. I would begin to to get nauseous, to get to get sick. I couldn't sleep. Um, you know, I would begin to to cry and and and I would stay up as late, as late, late, late, late, you know, as I possibly could, just hoping that I could be up until the sun breaks. I would sleep maybe for an hour, and then I would wake up and realize it's still dark and go into a hyperventilation all over again.

Khalila McCoy 23:16

Why didn't you want to sleep?

Shelley Meche'tte 23:19

For whatever reason, nighttime was a trigger. So I can't explain why it was, but nighttime for me, as soon as the sun went down, my my body went into total panic mode.

Khalila McCoy 23:33

Okay.

Shelley Meche'tte 23:34

You know, and so the situation did not happen at night, but it could have been because I was rushed back to the hospital at night, you know, who knows? But for whatever reason, as soon as the sun went down, I would begin to to hyperventilate, to have anxiety, to go into panic attacks. I can't breathe. Um, I go into tears. You know, I try to talk my mom all night to death because I was staying at her house. So I want to talk to her all night long, you know. I was completely 1 million percent exhausted. My body was fatigued from me just trying so hard to stay awake. And then when the daytime would come, I would nap.

Khalila McCoy 24:15

Okay.

Shelley Meche'tte 24:15

You know, because I sleep.

Khalila McCoy 24:16

So you could sleep in the in the daytime. In the daytime.

Shelley Meche'tte 24:20

And I and it could, and again, it could be because everybody was moving. Something was going forward. You know, my uncle was moving around the house, my mom was up, my daughter, you know, so it could just be. So it could so it could, you know, talking through it now, that could have just been it. You know, I'm stuck and and I I would feel at night like I'm suffocating. And so as soon as the sun would come up, as soon as I see the break of sun, or as soon as I hear my uncle in the kitchen, then I then every part of me would relax and I would fall asleep.

Khalila McCoy 25:00

Yeah. Do you feel too like because you had to keep going to the hospital, they didn't have answers for you. They didn't know what happened. Do you feel like that added on to your anxiety? Were you, you know, people like Google things and try to figure out are you like desperately trying to figure out like what was going on with your body? Okay.

Shelley Meche'tte 25:16

I was a Google queen. And let me tell you, for me, what um information was too much. Okay. Because so the information, I believe that I needed that information, but I couldn't stop. So I would continue and continue and continue. And so it became information overload for me. And then that began to bring on more anxiety because every time, number one, I didn't trust my body anymore. And I didn't trust my own feelings anymore. And I didn't trust that I understood what was happening anymore. So the minute my fingernail, you know, broke, I'm jumping. And I'm like, why would my fingernail put, you know, could I have could it be brittle, this and that? Well, that's gonna lead to this, and now I'm gonna die. And so it was it was always that serious. Yeah, yeah. Yes, everything was that serious. If my eyebrow jumped, now I'm I'm Googling, you know, what happens when your eyebrow jump, okay, um, my nerves are now my nerves are this and my nerves are that, my eye keeps jumping, am I gonna die? It was a vicious cycle.

Khalila McCoy 26:17

Yeah.

Shelley Meche'tte 26:17

And so while I needed the information to uh to help put myself on track, too much of the information was killing me. Right. And I had to make a conscious decision to to not read, hear, listen, watch, nothing. Take the medication, record your your uh your pressure, lean on your support system.

Khalila McCoy 26:43

Talk to us about your support system. I'm saying your mom and your husband, children.

Shelley Meche'tte 26:49

Yes. They were 100%. My mother, you know, you just never stop being a mom. I can just, you know, I can just say so much, and it just makes me so emotional, you know. My mom, she already has her own health issues, you know, she has uh knee issues. So, you know, it's painful a lot of times for her to to walk around too much, you know. So she's on she's on a king uh sometimes, and she was up every morning, every single morning, making sure that I'm okay, making sure to take care of me, cooking meals, three meals uh a day to make sure that I'm completely nourished, um, making sure that my pressure is okay. She's um making sure to check, check my pressure, making sure that I'm having medication. She's out shopping for me, making sure that I have the proper this, the proper. She's washing clothes. She's, you know, even one night I couldn't sleep, and I just broke down. I broke down into tears, and you know, uh and I just I couldn't sleep. And, you know, and I'm just like, and I had to change medicines because the medicine was was make was um making me nauseated and medicine was making me where I couldn't function. And I'm I'm a person who I'm used to doing everything for myself, and I'm very independent, and you know, I have a business, and I can't not be able to function. Right. And my mother, as I sat there, you know, um crying, and she came and she just sat next to me and she just she just put her arms around me and she's like, it's gonna be okay. You know, we're gonna figure, we're gonna figure this out. It's moment by moment, but we're gonna figure it all out. And it's okay. And she stayed up with me and she, you know, I don't know how long we stayed up, but she stayed up, and not one time did she complain. She prayed with me, she walked the floor with me, she hugged me, and she made it okay for me to break down. Yes. And I think that's what I I needed to be okay with not being okay. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. So that um it didn't stop the future tears. But it put me in a position to um to really be able to lean even more on my faith, to really lean on God, to really lean on my family. What I realized later is everything that they were going through, you know, they had all types of anxiety. My husband couldn't rest, you know. Um mind you, during this time, none of my family stopped working. So they were up at three in the morning in in um in ER with me. And some days we were at ER for 24 hours straight, for 36 hours straight. They were sleeping in chairs in my room. They were sleeping at the end of my bed. They were exhausted, and they would leave my hospital room and they would go to work. And then they would leave from work and they would come back and come right back. And so while I may have been the one who was healing physically, my family was going through emotionally. My family was going through physically. My family didn't know, you know, the next time I went into the hospital if I was gonna come out. So I hadn't realized until later that, you know, one of my kids had a full, you know, just a full breakdown. She just you know, feet position breakdown to where she just went into full, full panic mode. You know, my my other child literally passed out one day just from exhaustion because it was just too, it's just too much. You know, my husband couldn't sleep. Every time something would happen, he would jump up. He said to me recently, I was laying in the in the bed, and I guess I wasn't moving enough for him. But I walked into the bedroom, and this was recently, maybe a couple of weeks ago. He says, you know, I come in, I come in the room, and sometimes I still feel like is something, you know, is something wrong. You know, did something happen to you while you were sleeping? He's like, I still feel that way seven months later. Wow. That I don't know if something is gonna happen to you in your sleep. Mm-hmm. So it's not just me. This affected my entire family. We're all in a position of healing.

Khalila McCoy 31:43

Do you guys talk about how you feel with each other, or do you still, I don't know, think of ways to like manage that anxiety together? Or is it more just like, okay, I see you're struggling, so I'll help you in that moment.

Shelley Meche'tte 31:55

Yeah, I think I think it's more of helping in the moment. I think we've taken time to talk about it. They call themselves trying to protect me, honey. So I didn't even find out about this stuff until months later. And I was like, Oh, we didn't want you to worry. I'm like, see, I'm about to fight everybody up in here now, okay? So these are things that I didn't even know about. So while everybody is rallying, you know, around me, because everybody knows that everybody knew how much anxiety I was dealing with. My daughter, uh, sweet thing, poor thing, she had something to do one day. And um, this was after I had gotten back home, and she was supposed to do something that day. But there were days where I would wake up and it just wasn't good. I I didn't know what it was, and I couldn't breathe, and I felt my chest was heavy. And this particular day, she was supposed to go somewhere. And when I got up, I laid down on the couch, and she said, um, she said, it's not a good, it's not a good day, it's not a good morning. And I said no. And I really, I really tried to hold it in, but I just fell out into just tears. I fell out into tears, and she was supposed to leave that day, and she canceled her plans, you know, to to stay there just to be, you know, just to be with me, to walk me through. And so then there was the other side of that where I felt, you know, I felt so bad. I felt guilty. I felt like, you know, I'm stopping people from living their their lives. So then that was another thing of where of the guilt that came, that came with it. I don't want people to feel like I'm messing their lives up. Right. Because now, you know, you're you're stopping your day to stay home with me. You know, I I felt like I couldn't be by myself. Um, my kids, they drove me around for maybe, I don't know. I stayed with my mom for I think a little over a month. And once I came home, I think my kids drove me around for like another month or two, something like that, because I was scared to drive.

Khalila McCoy 34:02

Which makes sense because you never know when one of your symptoms are gonna come upon.

Shelley Meche'tte 34:07

Exactly. Exactly. So I was just too scared to get behind the wheel. So everybody was driving me everywhere, especially my daughters. My daughter, she just, you know, she's driving me around, she's changing her schedule, you know. And then my children when this happened. Uh 30 and 23. Okay. Yeah. So they were just um, and my daughter actually, it was right before her 23rd birthday. So really at that time, it was 30 and 22 because she was about to turn 23. Um, yeah. So they really kind of put put things on hold for me. And then there was my husband who is like he would love to have to, you know, to put things on hold, but he got to pay for the hospital bills. The lights still gotta come on, you know. And so he's out there working, plus trying to to manage over here with with me, plus trying to keep himself together, plus trying to be the emotional strength. So there's a lot, you know, there's lots of nuances that have come along with me, myself, trying to heal and all of us trying to give each other space to heal. I think at this point, like I said, I was um, I was shocked, you know, to hear my husband a few weeks ago say it still is like, you know, it is everything okay, you know. He I guess he'd be wanting to shake me sometime. Like, don't disturb my sleep, man. It sounds like you know, like a mirror over your nose, make sure you're still breathing. Please don't make sure your thing is good. But I cannot I can understand that. I truly think.

Khalila McCoy 35:50

Yeah. So I know when we talked, we talked a lot about the faith aspect of that. So three strokes in one day, not finding out what's going on, the anxiety, the fear, things that are going on with your family. Where does faith fit into this?

Shelley Meche'tte 36:08

Deliberately. And yeah, deliberately. Because I would lay there and I was um, you know, growing up in the church, there's such a, and I don't want to use the word stigma, but there's such a thing going, not fearing. Don't fear, you know, don't have fear, don't worry. Worry is a sin. Da-da-da-da-da. So you have all of these things combating you in your head. Well, if you trust God, da-da-da, you know, and then you hear from other believers, hey, you know, God's gonna keep you, God's gonna this, God's gonna that. And while I believe that, you have to understand I'm suffering emotionally here. I am breaking down every single day. I can, you know, and then I'm pretending to be okay because I don't want to worry other people. I'm in emotional, mental, and physical turmoil every single day. And then the only thing that I have to lean on is people saying, you know, God's gonna do this, God's gonna do that, versus me. This is my personal feeling, me feeling like um I would have loved for somebody to say to me, I under, I get it. You're scared. I understand, you're having a really hard time. I get it. But you're, you know, you don't know what's gonna happen. You're uncertain. I understand. Live in those feelings. And as you live in those feelings, I'll lift you up. I'll pray, I will pray for the part that you can't do right now, versus me feeling like um, I had to hold up that part of me. And it's not to say that other people didn't pray or this, that. That's not what I'm saying. What I'm saying is it just would have been for me, I would have felt better knowing that I'm not struggling to make sure. Is he okay, God? Is this okay, God? I'm scared, God, but are you mad at me because I'm scared? You upset God because I I'm anxious? No. No. So I had to lean on that. I had to, I was, I had to be in my word. I had, you know, and I was knocking on God's door, like, you sure, Jesus? You sure? Are you mad at me? I had I I was listening to um to gospel music because I had to, in order for my spirit to rest, that's when I would get some sleep. After hours of listening, I would drift off and then I would jump up. But I had to be in that, I was in conversation with God 28 hours a day. What does some of that conversation sound like? Some of that conversation was I'm I'm scared. A lot of the conversation was, I'm scared. Are you, are you sure? Are you gonna keep me? Are you gonna, are you gonna hold me? Can you breathe? I told the Lord one day, I said, I am so grateful to be alive, but I just want you to know this side, this side is exhausting. This is exhausting. I have more, I have more peace while I was dying than I do now. No. I said, you know, I said, this is exhausting. This healing process is is draining me, sir. It's draining. But I felt so good being able to be real with God and and understanding that I have your word. I have your word, and even if I don't feel like your word is true, I need to know that your word is true so that I will be deliberate in reciting your word. See, I didn't have to feel that it was it was it in order for me to keep it on my tongue, because faith comes by hearing. And so I needed to hear it over and over and over again, even if I didn't feel it. Do you have some scriptures that you used? Oh my God. You know what? I don't even I I don't even know if I had had a specific um scripture, but I know I kept saying to God that He that He was the one, He was the keeper, He was the keeper of my soul. And I continue to lean on the fact that that God's promises that I was still here for a reason and that began a good work in me. He he wasn't done. Yes, he would be faithful and and it wasn't done. And the reason I knew it wasn't done is because I was here.

Khalila McCoy 40:32

You're here, yeah.

Shelley Meche'tte 40:33

My whole thing was you're not gonna save me just to kill me. It it don't make sense. It's something in here that's still here, and you're faithful. I don't feel it, so therefore I have to speak it. I have to speak that no weapon formed against my body was going to prosper, no weapon formed against my mind was going to prosper, even through even through the tears, even through not being able to breathe, I would just have to whisper it. I, you know, because these were things that I needed to believe were true, even if I didn't feel like it was true. I believe that God is who he says he is. I believe no matter what, good day, bad day, great day, you know, terrible day. I still believe that you are who you say you are. And so I had to lean on the fact that I believe that you're a God, who you say you are, a god, a God of love. You make no mistake. I believe that. But as I believe that, I just want you to know I'm in turmoil right now. I can't breathe right now. You know, I I'm suffocating right now, and I need your peace to lay on me.

Khalila McCoy 41:44

Yes. And you and I talked about this a little bit before, just like you said, about that idea that we can't be honest with God in that way. And that's exactly what he wants for us to do is he says cast all our cares on him. And it's not like, hey God, like, you know, I'm okay, but I'm not okay. Like he wants that real raw, like what are you going through? Yeah, because if you're not honest with him and being honest with yourself, there's no way, right? He can move and he can work if you're trying to bring this fake person to him. Exactly. Do you find like through that? I know you had your family. I don't know, like as far as friends and community around you, did people rally around that idea? Were people kind of like, oh no, don't don't pray that way, don't be that way?

Shelley Meche'tte 42:31

It wasn't anything verbal, you know. Um so, and a lot of people didn't even know that it that it happened. I'm I'm an extremely private person. So it's not like, you know, it's like, oh, hey, social media, look what happened. I that's not me. People who who were close to my to my network, they knew. Um, certain people who my husband talked to, they knew. You know, good friends, they they knew. People at my mom's church, they knew. So little, you know, a few people here, here and there, they knew what um, they knew what happened. And I had, and the, you know, the group that I have of people, they are they're wonderful. And we have some wonderful friends, uh, a married couple, who they came the day that I was released from the hospital, and they were at my house, you know. They were at my house to to visit me, to love on me, to pray with me, uh, to feed me. Um, I had people come to the hospital, you know, my brother found out and left his job and, you know, was right there. So I had I had lots of love from the from my nice little tight community. And if I knew you asked me about about a scripture, and I may not have had a script, a favorite scripture that I leaned on, but I remember saying, if I never knew before, I I really understand the verse that says death has no sting. It's oh death, where's your sting? It's it's not here, it's not in the believer because we have a Promise of what's going to happen once we live this life. So when I said that I felt nothing but peace as I was dying, I felt that peace because death has no sting to those who are in Christ. Amen.

Khalila McCoy 44:14

That's awesome. So tell me about the career switch. How did that just make you decide that you wanted to change what you were doing?

Shelley Meche'tte 44:24

It was, it was almost, it wasn't even so much of a switch. It was really like a light bulb. Okay. Because I was excited about purpose and I really wanted people to know what God had done for me. And so I was telling everybody, I'm like, you know what? Literally, God raised me from the dead, baby. Call me Lazarita because God can't believe that. Okay. All right, Lazarita. That is amazing. In my crib, we'd be joking. She'd be like, what's up, Lazarita? And so, you know, I was so excited about God raising me from the dead, you know, and I and I I will stand on that as long as I live, that my body was the, you know, the light bleeding, and you turned it around and you put it back in there. And I was so excited about that. When I came home, I'm like, you know, I love what I do, but that that's not the full purpose. I don't believe that that's my purpose. What I've done in life is wonderful. I work with my entrepreneurs. I help them combat burnout and frustration. That's great. But that's not promise. What is the promise? Promise is is the the purpose, the purpose that I've been aligned to. I've been grinding and hustling these all these years, and to a degree, that's great. I'm a hustler. But I think that it's it has taken on a different definition. And hustle culture has become a breakdown in some sense, where we don't give ourselves permission to uh to have alignment, to allow God to let his grace guide. And in that moment, I believe that I that I heard God say, you know, it's time to switch that up and to move from working with working with women of God. Because women of God need to understand and know their purpose. And women of God needs to need to know that they don't have to grind to get where what it is that I'm giving to them. If they get in alignment, if they walk with grace, then not only will their business grow, but their life will grow. And you don't have to worry about burnout, exhaustion. You don't have to worry about those things because you have a formula where you'll be able to work, rest, build. You know, there's a time for everything, including a time to sit down and be rejuvenated and be refreshed and be renewed.

Khalila McCoy 46:50

So throughout this whole podcast, right? You've been sharing your story. I love your voice, everything that you've been doing. When you just start talking about your purpose, you just lit up, your voice changed. Like it is clear you are doing what you are supposed to be doing. And I love that. Like, yes, everything about you says, like, this is where I am supposed to be. I am blessed, and that God is leading me in this. And that's, I'm assuming that's what you want the women you work with to feel.

Shelley Meche'tte 47:20

Yes, this is where I want us all to be. The one thing that I took away is there was nothing wrong with what I was doing. But the the thing is, was it God aligned? Right. That's the difference. Yes. I was working with women, I'm still working with women. It's just that now I'm working with women of God, and we're gonna put down grind, we're gonna pick up grace, and we're gonna do it in purpose. We're gonna discover our purpose, we're gonna find out is my business even a part of my purpose. The reason why you might be so frustrated and upset all the time is because you weren't even supposed to be in that business. So let's let's go back. Let's go back and let's say, hey God, where was I supposed to be? What was I supposed to be doing? Let's align these things so that I can build in grace. The bottom line is we taking off grind. We're gonna we're we're gonna take that off and we're gonna leave that. God has aligned me with with a refreshed purpose, but I still have the same gifts and talent I had before. The purpose is the same. The way I, the, the way I maneuver the purpose is different. The way I put it out is different. The assignment is different. God, I'm still a speaker. God is still giving me the ability, the coach. God has still given me all the same gifts and talent. They all are still there. The assignment is new and I'm up for it. And I love it. I love it.

Khalila McCoy 48:45

How did you do the switch to, like you said, the women of grace and the women of God? What was the process like for you to get that up and running? Chad, I'm still doing a switch, okay? Okay.

Shelley Meche'tte 48:59

I am switch.

Khalila McCoy 49:02

Okay.

Shelley Meche'tte 49:03

In the process of working on my website so that I can begin to bridge all of that together. And um, eventually, as I step a little bit back into social media, I've never been a big social media person, but as I step back into it, my content will now begin to change a little bit. You'll find a little more um uh health awareness on there, you know, mainly about strokes, of course. You'll find some of the same things that I've talked about, which is burnout prevention, but now I'm aligning it with God. You know, I'm aligning those things with with Christ. And so for the women who who love God and you know, and who want to stick around, wonderful, awesome. For those who are mompreneurs, but that's not their thing, they'll trickle off. But because I believe God, because I trust God and I'm walking in my grind, whoever stays, stays. Whoever goes, goes. And we still gonna I'm moving. Because I'm not, I'm not trying to build my followers. I don't care. Follow or don't. But the ones who do follow, we're gonna align ourselves with Christ and we're gonna allow him to order our steps so that we'll be able to build a prosperous life and business. We're not leaving nothing behind and relationships and everything else that God has for us. But we're gonna do it with him being the compass and not us trying to guide God.

Khalila McCoy 50:28

Yes. We're in faith, right? We know like blessings in the storm. And nobody wants to go through the storm. It's hard, it's horrible. And like you said, we're like, God, why? Like, there was no other way you could teach me this. Like, what do you feel like you learned through this? Other than like your business and stuff. It could be about you, about your family, about the world. Like, what do you feel like you have gained from this experience?

Shelley Meche'tte 50:52

That honestly, life is a gift and you're not in control. It doesn't matter. You don't get to control the death date. So do everything you've been called to in the dash. I have no control of that. I wake up every morning not knowing if I'm going to bed tonight. And I know that to be a truth because it happened. I woke up, I went to the ER, and not one time did I ever think that I would end up in a hospital bed clinging to life. That wasn't part of the plan. And so when I get up in the morning, it is a true gift because I understand in a way that I didn't understand before, that there's no promises when it comes to the expansion of life. There are no guarantees. The only guarantee that I have in this life is that it's gonna come to an end. That's the only guarantee that I have is that this life ends. So, whatever I'm gonna do in that dash, I want to make sure that I empty every single thing out in me. When I leave this earth, I want to leave empty. I want to be coughing up dust. That's how your girl wants to be. Because I did everything everyone, I poured all that I was supposed to in the purpose that God has provided and given. So, as I said before, while there was nothing wrong with what I was doing before, the question I had to ask myself is was it aligned with purpose? That was the question. Not did it benefit others, not the accolades, not how great it was. Every, you know, the thing, the programs that I've done have been great. All of that's been great. The question now was, was it aligned? And so now that's all I want. I want those things that are aligned because even though those things were wonderful, if they weren't purposeful, if they weren't connected to my purpose, then it wasn't really fruitful. Not for what I was called to. It was fruitful in a world sense, sure, but it wasn't fruitful to my calling. And that's what matters. The grave is filled with calling and purpose. I don't want to add to it.

Khalila McCoy 53:05

I like that. That was good. So what would you say to our listeners today? What can they take away? If they take away one thing, how can they rise after hearing your story?

Shelley Meche'tte 53:17

Know that you're purposed. That's the thing that I want you to know. Know that you have been created and designed deliberately. Your handprint is yours, baby. Can't nobody be you? And I do mean nobody. There's not anyone on the face of this earth who is going to be able to stand in your place. There are lives that will only be touched because of you. Because of you. There are people who will hear my story, say, oh wow, that's great. Look what God did. And they'll move on. But yet they'll hear your story, how you stumped your toe on a bike, and all of a sudden they whole world has turned around. Because you are the connection. You are the person. So if there would be anything I would want people to know, I will want them to know that you are golden. You are unique. You are special. And you are the apple of God's eye. There will never be another one quite like you.

Khalila McCoy 54:22

Thank you. I feel so special right now. That was so wonderful. And you were right. That's why I wanted to have this podcast, right? Is for people to see like how powerful they are and how if we kind of come together and listen to each other's stories and figure things out, like we are not that different. Like you said, we all have a purpose. We all are meant for something. And finding that and standing strong in who you are. Yes. And it doesn't take away from who someone else is. We build together. And I feel like you have embodied that in everything that you shared today. So I really, really appreciate what you've shared with us. I appreciate, I know you said you're a private person. So I'm sure getting on podcasts and talking to strangers.

Shelley Meche'tte 55:08

I like, I don't know if they want to do this, but what I love is that, you know, I'm I'm a multi-faceted, you know, multifaceted person like all of us. And so this is my this is what I do, and this is what I love. I love speaking. I love empowering women. I love doing doing events. And once it's over, I love leaving. Yes. I love to get more. And I love to not talk to you. That's what I'm doing. You know, but while I'm there, you you can't tear me away because that's what I was made to do. That's what I was created to do. I was created to pour life into others. The gifts that God have given me, they're not for me. They're for a breakthrough in you or whatever else you need. Whatever you need, God has given me a word to bless your life. And I take that seriously, and I love every part of it. But once that part of me is closed, once the business is off for the day, I'm back to my shale. Yeah.

Khalila McCoy 56:13

Well, you have to refresh and then pour into your family as well and spend time with them. So that's definitely good having that boundary.

Shelley Meche'tte 56:22

Once I close that door, everything is closed off. There, there's there's absolutely nothing. Nothing.

Khalila McCoy 56:29

So for the moments that you are on and available, where can people find you and connect with you?

Shelley Meche'tte 56:34

Yes, you can find me um on my website, which is www.shellymashe.com. That's S-H-E-L-L-E-Y M-E-C-H-E-T-T-E. And so it's a little under construction. So, you know, you know, one button may work, the other button may not work. But it's it's coming, y'all. It's coming. Okay. And we can always connect on social media, on um Instagram as well as Facebook. We can connect there. It is at my name as well. And I would love to leave your listeners a gift and we could connect with that as well. I love to leave them my five-day journal of being able to refresh and realign. And so we'll be able to connect there as well. And I'll leave that link for your listeners today.

Khalila McCoy 57:18

Perfect. All right, Miss Shelley. I really appreciate your time, like I said, and we will keep in touch and follow what's going on with you.

Shelley Meche'tte 57:27

Thank you so much. It was a pleasure.

Khalila McCoy 57:33

Thank you for a great conversation, Shelly, and for your uplifting and powerful words. I kid you not when I say I left this conversation feeling like I could do anything. Don't forget to check out the show notes today. You will find two links. The first is to Shelly's five-day journey with God journal. I haven't finished it yet, but I have read through them all. Yes, I looked ahead. And the prompts are requiring me to look within and also realize that I need to surrender a few more things to God. But you know me. I love reflecting, so this journal is perfect. The second link is to join a wait list for Shelly's new book, God Said No, a Stroke Survivor's Story of Resilience, Recovery, and Renewal. When you join the wait list, you'll be entered for a chance to win a personally signed copy of the book, and you'll get a link to join the virtual release party. The book drops on May 27th, and the release party is May 30th at 10 a.m. Pacific. I will be at the party so you and I can go together. So tell me, what did you think of today's episode? What are you taking away with you that will help add value to your life and to the lives of those around you? Send me a text using the link at the top of the show notes or drop a line under this week's episode art on Instagram at WhereWeRisepod. Alright, y'all, that's all from me for now. But as you move on through the rest of your day, I hope you take a moment to listen a little louder to yourself, to the people you love, and to the things that connect us in ways we sometimes forget to notice. I'll meet you back here next time. See ya bye.